MTV VMA Noms Announced

Carrie Underwood is the only nominee representing country nominated for an MTV Video Music Award. In other surprising news, the sun rose today. Underwood is nominated for Best New Artist for “Before He Cheats.” Justin Timberlake and Beyonce lead the pack with seven awards. A list of all the nominees here.

Willie Nelson: Tabloid Fodder?

When cultural anthropologists of the future debate the cultural values and priorities, they need look no further than our tabloids. In the 1990s, the focus of the tabloids was alien abduction, Bill Clinton and Oprah, dare I say the trinity of 90s pop culture. Today, the focus of the tabloids is usually whatever blond gal aged 17-26 that has overdosed, gotten skinny (or fat) or gotten married (or divorced), some Scientologists and Oprah. And Willie Nelson? I couldn’t help but notice the headline of the National Examiner which read “Willie Nelson: Ill and Dying!” (or something to that effect). If you’re not familiar with the National Examiner, its basically what National Enquirer readers turn to after their second lobotomy.

Thus, I am not bringing this up because of the story’s “content” (you’re a fool not to consult the Willie-pedia over at Still Is Still Moving for your Willie Nelson info), rather to ask the question: is Willie Nelson really a profitable face on tabloid covers? Magazine sales often hinge solely on who’s on the cover (apparently Lindsay Lohan’s the cash cow du jour) and I am surprised that Willie Nelson is worth the tabloid space that could hold details of Oprah vs Dr. Phil.

Farm Aid NY Details Announced

 

Farm Aid announced the line-up for its 2007 festival in New York City — Randall’s Island, specifically. In addition to regulars Willie Nelson, John Mellencamp, Neil Young and Dave Matthews, special guests Tim Reynolds, The Allman Brothers Band, The Counting Crows, Matisyahu, Guster, The Derek Trucks Band, Warren Haynes, Supersuckers, The Ditty Bops and Montgomery Gentry will hit the stage. This announcement also tells us that these bands are still together — good to know.

In keeping with their altruistic aim, the concert will exclusively serve organic, local, humanely-raise and family-farmed food. Tickets are $52 and well worth the chance of seeing Neil Young and Montgomery Gentry cross paths. You go your way, I’ll go mine I suppose.

Top 5 Country Fans in Springfield

The summer of the Simpsons (as June-August 2007 will inevitably be known forever throughout history) got me thinking: where’s country music on the Simpsons? For a series that has consistently brilliantly mirrored and mocked American culture for almost 20 years, there’s a surprising lack of one of America’s favorite musical genres on the animated program. “Colonel Homer” — in which Homer manages the career of Lurleen Lumpkin (voiced by Beverly D’Angelo — slated for a return to Springfield in season 20) — poked fun at Elvis’s Colonel Parker and revealed to the audience that Homer always dreamed “of managing a beautiful country singer.” Guest appearances by musicians from Tito Peunte to Paul McCartney to Britney Spears have been de rigeur from season 1, yet the only country stars that have visited Springfield are Dolly Parton in “Sunday, Cruddy Sunday” and Willie Nelson in “Behind the Laughter.”

As the real writers for The Simpsons won’t add country music, I’ve done their work for them. Here are my Top 5 Simpsons characters who could easily be infused with country love.

5. Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel

“Some folk’ll never eat a skunk/but then again some folk’ll/like Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel”

Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel (ne Cletus Del Roy Splunker) is the most stereotypical country fan in Spingfield. Cletus seems like a Bill Monroe and Jimmie Rodgers man, if for no other reason than he hasn’t heard of anything more recent, and his theme song in “22 Short Films About Springfield” included a banjo so I see him as bluegrass or old country fan. This bodes well for the preservation of traditional music since Cletus has at least 26 known children including his daughter, ahem, Caitlin.

4. Lisa Simpson

Always first and foremost a jazz fan, Lisa Simpson might delve into the world of country, especially to support her ideological brethren like vegetarians Carrie Underwood and Shania Twain, progressives Kris Kristofferson and Willie Nelson, and feminist icon Loretta Lynn. She is so on Team Chicks.

3. Barney Gumble

Barney’s attraction to country music would be fueled by, well, his fuel — a love for alcohol. Barney doesn’t have friends in low places: he is that friend. “Whiskey River,” “Honky Tonk Man,” and “There Stands the Glass” might earn heavy rotation on Barney’s play list. He probably doesn’t like “One Scotch, One Bourbon, One Beer” because he’s never had one scotch, bourbon or beer.

2. Bart Simpson

Traditional country may not entice Bart, because this fourth-grader is strictly an outlaw man, Waylon Jennings and Hank Williams Jr. for sure. “I’ve Always Been Crazy” and “Family Tradition” both speak to the Bartman’s values and priorities. Look for “I Will Not Let Babies Grow Up to Be Cowboys” on the blackboard of his heart.

1. Waylon Smithers

Despite his first name, I don’t see Smithers as an outlaw. Something tells me Smithers loves him some Dolly. In addition to his devotion to working “9 to 5″ for Mr. Burns, he also carries an undying love for the elderly misanthrope and Dolly always comes in handy for some heartbreak whether it’s “Here You Come Again” or “I Will Always Love You.”

Though the Simpsons twang-ification wouldn’t be complete without more country guest stars. Here are my nominations: The Dixie Chicks, Reba McEntire, Dale Watson, Emmylou Harris, Loretta Lynn, Neko Case and Vince Gill. Who would you like to see in Springfield?

If you just can’t get enough of country-Simpsons cross-overs Four Fingers Music: The Bluegrass Tribute to the Music Made Famous by The Simpsons is out this week. It’s a fun record, probably only for hard-core Simpsons fans and even they will be reminded that the best version of “Who Needs the Kwik-E-Mart?” is, not surprisingly, Apu’s.